Isn't This Supposed to Get Easier?!

So Sunday is another baby shower for a friend. I have been doing amazingly well lately with all that kind of stuff.  That is until I walked into Buy Buy Baby!  That place even smells like a baby!  I was reeling!

I walked around aimlessly and had many people question if I needed help.  I politely turned them all down and ventured to figure it out on my own.  I slowly walked through the bedding and wondered if I would ever be the one picking that stuff out.  It was a little too painful to look at the themes.  I felt as if the giraffes and tigers were all laughing at me.

Then I slowly made it over to the bath stuff.  That's where I made myself find the things.  Bath stuff is a little safer than the bottles or onesies or blankets or frames or car seats of diaper bags.  I was determined to finish my list there.  Even there I looked around pathetically wishing that it could be me.

April hold significant emotion for me.  It was in April of 2004 that I threw out the birth control and so naively thought I'd be knocked up by the following school year.  Here I sit 7 years later in the same boat I was then.

I know that I have lot going for me and things are on the up, but it just sucks!  I mean how long do we have to suffer?  Sorry to be a downer, just needed to vent.  Thanks for listening!