Dec 20, 2010

Wow! That Was Rough!

Does anyone watch Giuliana and Bill?  I stopped watching awhile back because their journey hit so close to home, I couldn't deal with it.  Over the weekend, at our family Christmas, a cousin was talking about the show.  Tonight was the season finale, so I taped a few past episodes and watched tonight.

My eyes hurt I have cried so hard.  Watching Giuliana and Bill go through all the drama they experienced on this last cycle was just like watching Jesse and I on the TV.  Yes, I know, Jesse and I never experienced a retrieval or a transfer, but all the emotional things she talked about was as if she was taking the words out of my mouth.

The thing that got me was the final scene when they get the call from their doctor and it was more bad news.  They were so hopeful, they had thought they did everything right, they were so SURE!  That's the part that was me.  How many times was I there?  I knew that this would be the month.  This would be the cycle.  My heart just breaks.

The hardest part is there are so many couples going through that on a daily basis.  Why?  Why does it have to be that way?  Why can people who aren't trying or don't want babies able to conceive and people who would do ANYTHING can't?  Why?

I know life's not about fairness, but infertility is just so damn UNFAIR!  I'm sorry to be so down in this post, but I sometimes just wallow in this pain.  Infertility stinks!



Megan said...

Yup, I've been watching and it's so PAINFUL to watch! Us too, haven't gone through IVF but the emotions and the feelings are all there. Infertility does INDEED, SUCK!!! Ugh! (((HUGS))) for all the infertiles out there!!

Kim said...

I have been watching for a few months. I dvr it, so will actually watch it here in a little while. I have been through ivf (bfn) and a fet (bfp.) So, I relate to everything that they are going through as well. Especially the injections she did in last weeks episode. I hate shots too!! I was so hoping for the best foe hem, but after reading your post, it looks like they were not successful again. Poor things!!

Just Another Mother said...

I have always respected them as a couple for opening up their lives that way and showing people how tough the day to day struggles with IF are. No matter what form those struggles take.

Did you see them on the View several months ago? They were on twice. Once before the miscarriage. Jullianna was talking about how her doctors told her to try to gain weight and that it was hard for her to put on pounds. Whoppie ragged on her and said that if you want a baby she should do whatever it takes. The way she said it rubbed me the wrong way. Of course she is doing everything it takes! She does way more then any fertile couple ever has to do. It made me mad the way she said it. It's hard enough to speak about it without having someone give you a hard time.

I have still been following you and I can't wait for you to be a mom!

Ashley said...

I have been watching this season, too. It's really refreshing to watch some actual "reality" t.v. that is really real, you know? (Not that I would wish infertility on anyone, but it's nice to know that it can happen to anyone.) I didn't realize it was the season finale, though. Hope they have better luck next season! (And us, too!!)